‘My partner makes more money than me but wants to do 50-50’

May 24, 2024
2,013 Views

“Me and my boyfriend both pay the rent and utilities 50/50; this is something we both agreed on and I also think the main necessities should be split this way,” affirmed Leesha.

“However, whenever it comes to planning a holiday, buying groceries or a having night out, I simply can not afford to keep this 50-50 rule anymore.”

Both Leesha and Tom* enjoy eating out at finer restaurants and going out for entertainment, but their disposable income is wildly different.

“With this ongoing inflation, all these things that I used to be able to afford – even by myself – not so long ago, became gradually a financial burden to me,” Leesha shared to Reddit about her real life dilemma.

Tom asserted, however, that if they are going to be equals in the relationship, they need to pay 50-50.

“I would like to hear other opinions on this,” Leesha said, adding that Tom would only agree to pay more if she becomes “submissive to him”.

One Reddit contributor bluntly replied: “I would have walked out and left as soon as those words came out of his mouth. In another seven to 10 years, you will do the same.”

In agreement, another wrote: “Took the words out of my mouth. Want to pay 50-50 on housing? Have a house or apartment that the lowest income party can afford. Food? Ditto. Vacations, same.”

Another quipped: “My attraction for a man would dry up so fast I’d get dehydrated.” One cautioned: “Financial manipulation and abuse is where this is going.”

On a different note, a Reddit community member said: “You need to stop ‘preferring’ to live above your means.

“I prefer to drive a Rolls-Royce but, hey, I’m not earning hundreds of thousands of [pounds] per year so I guess I just gotta suck it up and live with my Mazda.

“You can’t have champagne taste and a beer budget and expect to be able to support your lifestyle…

“You need to start making adult decisions where you choose to take fewer holidays, go on cheaper dates, and are more careful with your grocery spending.

“If he wants you to split everything 50-50, then he gets to live within your budget and not complain.”

Taking on the same tone, another added: “He needs to live within your means if he expects 50-50, not the other way around.

“He’s free to come to an equitable solution by paying more for higher end dates/groceries/holidays, if he so chooses.

“But his expectation that you pay what he pays on his choices for higher end things is not fair.”

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