‘My parents are not allowed at my wedding as they won’t pay for it’

Weddings are undeniably a costly affair that forces couples to fork out a large sum of money for their special day. While traditionally the father of a bride contributes or pays entirely for the wedding, more and more people are moving away from the custom to pay for themselves.

However, one bride values the tradition so much, that she was enraged when her parents said they would not pay for the wedding. So much so, that she has decided to ban them from attending altogether.

The bride said she had always dreamt about her wedding and thought about what she’d wear or what flowers she’d have, so she felt lucky that her parents talked about saving money so she could have the wedding she wanted.

But when she broke the news of her engagement to her parents, she was taken aback they did not mention anything about paying for it. Her doubts were confirmed when they later had a conversation and revealed they had been facing issues financially and therefore could not afford to pay for the wedding.

They tried to reason with her by explaining that the couple should pay for themselves as they both had high-paying jobs, but the bride was not having any of it.

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The bride said: “All of a sudden, the wedding that I’d dreamed about my whole life, just vanished. They didn’t even seem apologetic! I tried to reason with them, tried to explain my side of things, but they were hearing none of it.”

She explained she and her husband had just bought a new home and were planning on having children, and therefore could not afford it all by themselves.

Her parents reiterated they simply could not afford it, but would try to help the couple in other ways.

The angry bride said: “Their lack of sympathy really annoyed me and I ultimately told them that if they don’t want to be a part of the wedding financially, then they just shouldn’t bother coming. Since then, I’ve pretty much cut them off and I’m feeling pretty confident in my choice to not have them attend.”

However, her friends and sister told her they think she might have been too brash and would go on to regret ruining her relationship with her parents over this. So she took to writing Mail Online’s Dear Jane column to ask for advice.

Best-selling author Jane Green told the bride that a good wedding is not about throwing the “party of the year” but rather about “two people who were invested in being with each other”.

She explained that times have changed and if the couple have high-paying jobs, they should pay for it themselves, considering her parents were financially struggling.

The expert said: “I hope you are old enough to hear that withholding a wedding invitation to your parents over money is something you will deeply regret over the years.

“Not just because your father won’t get to walk you down the aisle, but because of what it says about you, and your values.”