Lucy Dacus Avoids Reading Comments About Julien Baker Relationship

When Lucy Dacus hard-launched her relationship with Julien Baker in a New Yorker interview earlier this year, she noted that her protective instincts kick in when it comes to their partnership. She wants to protect it from any potential parasocial overstepping, and part of that means keeping her eyes off of the comments.

In a recent interview with The Forty-Five, the singer-songwriter revealed that she didn’t see much of the public response to the news that she’s been dating her Boygenius bandmate. “Oh, because of me and Julien being together?” she responded when asked if being online has been intense lately. “I try not to look.” The glimpses she does get into how fans are reacting comes via memes. “Friends have been sending me funny things,” Dacus said. “It’s a happy thing — and Julien is very pro me letting people know.”

Still, she recognizes that fans can’t help but dissect the personal side of music, like her new album Forever Is a Feeling, especially when they know who the “you” is in each song. “In a way, that’s the bit that makes me feel uncomfortable,” Dacus said. “The lore of it all – people treating our lives like a Marvel Universe. “But then again, what is lore if not the story? Some parts of my story I keep for myself but this is the story that defines my life. So what am I gonna do?”

Avoiding the comments has provided Dacus with an increased sense of security. In March, she told the New Yorker, “It only takes a handful to make your life feel like a really easily threatened thing. I’ve been practicing not reinforcing that narrative to myself.” It’s a small adjustment that goes a long way, especially when public insight into queer lives has created a true sense of danger in more sinister ways.

“I’m very blessed,” Dacus said of having a friend group largely made up of trans people. “But a lot of them are already getting their passports confiscated or have had them be quote unquote ‘corrected’. It’s really happening. Who knows what the end goals of these things are. It really emboldens people who are already hateful to be more vocal about it. The experience of everyday life feels more dangerous. Even just being a visible gay person, you become an outlet for people’s misguided hatred.”

In January, Dacus pledged $10,000 in donations to GoFundMe campaigns for trans surgeries, noting that “the government will never be the source of our validation or protection, we have to do it ourselves.”