‘I didn’t have a drop of alcohol for just over a year – here’s why I’m back on the booze’

Not a regular drinker at home, I found it fairly easy to abstain from alcohol through the months when you weren’t allowed outside your home – unless it was for a walk, or the supermarket shop.

While the nation decided to become boozier at home, from January to April 2021, I hadn’t touched a drop.

The real challenge, then, was when life began to return to normal – when pubs, bars, and social gatherings were back on the agenda.

Wanting to impose a challenge on myself, I thought, “How hard could it be to stay away from the booze”?

Surprisingly, I found it much easier than I had anticipated, even if people’s reactions around me weren’t the most supportive.

It was during this time of teetotalism that the British culture of drinking became glaringly obvious.

I saw a drunk middle-aged woman falling off a chair outside a pub; her head smashed against the concrete floor.

She laughed it off and stumbled back up again to take another chug of her white wine. I cringed.

I may have been sober, on a date during the day a few tables away from the incident, but I’ve been there. Drunk. On the floor.

It’s really eye-opening when you go to late-night places while being stone-cold sober.

I’ve seen a lot – people instigating fights for no reason, inappropriate fondling in public spaces, and the disconcerting look in someone’s eye when they’ve surpassed their drinking limit.

Some friends would plead that they wanted me to join in on the drinking “to have fun”; “I can have fun without drinking,” I’d smirk back.

I was still my outgoing, personable self, who loved socialising – I just didn’t become a mess at the end of the night, and I left at the right time.

There are too many occasions in my past, especially when I was a lot younger working in a bar in Covent Garden, where I would struggle to get home because I was so drunk.

When asked if I felt any different by not drinking, I would quip: “I don’t feel any different, but I’m sure my insides love me.”

My skin didn’t get clearer and I didn’t lose weight, but I’m sure my liver thanked me, and so did my bank balance.

While drinking culture is still looming large, having a drink nowadays is more of a choice, rather than a no-brainer, which is, I guess, the most fundamental shift in my mindset.

So, why have I returned to the booze? Because I like a good margarita, a decent glass of wine, or half a pint of beer on occasion, but I can still go out sober.