Autism: Helping a Friend (for Teens)

Sometimes it can be tough for people with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) to communicate and relate to others. So if a classmate, friend, or family member has ASD, you may wonder what to say and do at times. These tips can help.

Try to be patient and kind. It might be hard for people with ASD to understand how to be a friend.
Be very clear and matter of fact. People with ASD often take things literally, so say exactly what you mean. They may not understand playful jokes or sarcasm.
Guide the conversation, if needed. The back-and-forth of a regular conversation can be a challenge for someone with ASD. If your friend talks a lot about one specific topic, you might need to steer the chat to another subject.
Help explain social cues. Your friend might have trouble making eye contact, and understanding things like body language and facial expressions might not come naturally. For example, if your friend stands too close when you’re together, explain that an arm’s length is a good distance. And if you’re packing up your bookbag to leave, you might have to actually say that you need to go somewhere else.
Pay attention to where you hang out. Places with loud noises, bright lights, or crowds might bother someone with ASD. Ask your friend if it’d be better to meet somewhere quieter and less busy.
Accept your family member or friend. Some people with ASD don’t feel that they have a disorder and don’t want to change. They’re proud of who they are, and they want to be accepted, even though they may be different.
Be supportive. People with ASD may be teased, bullied, or left out because they’re not the same as everyone else. If you notice someone being bullied, stand up for that person and, if needed, tell a trusted adult. Teasing and bullying are never the right ways to treat someone with ASD or anyone else.